Godzilla attacks Cecil Holman Park

In a scene that could accurately be described as “something out of the movies”, potential visitors to Brownwood’s Cecil Holman Park were in for a shock Wednesday morning.

“All of the old park equipment was still standing, but the cement wall was reduced to rubble”, stated Brownwood Parks and Recreation employee Alfred Pennington,  who asked to remain unnamed.  Pennington continued “The City has already started trying to make people forget this happened, saying “Oh, we need better equipment for the kids” but all they’ve offered us so far is a warehouse full of old bricks they had lying around since they tore up Vine Street about 15 years ago.”

cecilholmanparkconstruction-1

Officials with the City of Brownwood would not return our calls. However, after further investigation, we found photos (purportedly) of Ultraman and Gomora enjoying a friendly game of volleyball on the historical archive website “Texas Traces”. The website states that the photo was from 1971, the same year the Emergency Broadcast System was activated due to a national emergency.

The official story is that Teletype operator W. S. Eberhardt “played the wrong tape” during a test, which sent an activation message authenticated with the codeword “HATEFULNESS” through the entire system, ordering stations to cease regular programming and broadcast the alert of a national emergency.. but now we wonder if this is all a cover up?

p2ath

If this indeed is all a cover up, then we think not only the kids of Brownwood deserve a great park, but so do the kaiju of the world!

satire

(Seriously though, the kids do deserve a great park so make sure and attend any ROC fundraisers in the area.)

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