“If only the snow had fallen on a football Friday,” say Early ISD Students

Area students are out of school today due to ice and snow, and for the second time in two weeks Early ISD is closed. While students rejoice at the opportunity to sleep in, several students brought up the idea that if the snow would have come a few months earlier, the school could have avoided having to play some of its football games. “It’s embarrassing,” said one anonymous student, “Bangs beat us 55-21, and they’re such a trashy little town. We don’t even understand how they have room for practice with all the trash laying everywhere.”

Another student wishing to remain anonymous believes he has figured out the problem with Early ISD football once and for all. “You see, we’re an academic school, we’ve told people for decades we’re an academic school. I just don’t see how you can get ten yards in four plays. Four doesn’t go in to ten evenly. Ten divided by four is two point five and it just doesn’t work, we can’t get two and a half yards every play, where’s the half come from?”

While having a snow day on a football Friday could certainly help Early ISD to avoid another loss, the school did notch three wins last season, giving them one of their best seasons on record. “We wouldn’t want the snow day to come on a day that we play someone we might actually beat. We beat San Saba 47-2 last year, but they’re the Armadillos so we think they were just playing dead against us. I’m sure they’ll get us next year.”

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